A few months ago my brother-in-law was getting out of his truck to go to work when he hit a patch of ice and fell hard. He tried to catch himself, as a natural reaction, and in the process twisted his wrist and as he fell made the wrist twist in such a way that he broke his arm. He looked around embarrassed by his fall but then he slowly got up as the pain seared through his arm and his wrist and he knew that this was not normal, this was not a sprain, this was a break. He arrived home and showed my sister who said it looked very "wrong" so off to the hospital they went. Upon x-rays it was a definite break. He was fixed up with a temporary splint and was sent back a few days later to have a cast put on, all pretty routine right? He went on trying to get better, trying to heal but the pain would not subside, he kept feeling the nudging pain rather than the comforts of healing. Upon removing his cast and x-ray again they discovered that the bone in fact was not healing right and he would need surgery to heal the bone. In order to actually fix this bone they would need to remove a piece of bone from below his knee on his leg, a place where the bone is strong enough and not as vital as the bones in your hands and wrist. He went in for the surgery and they told him that his leg would hardly hurt at all but that his wrist would give him the most pain. He was sent home with pain medication and told to rest. Days later he was still in immense pain, he knew he would need to be going back to work soon. The doctors assured him that all was well and he would start to have the pain lessen. It took longer than anticipated but the pain eventually did start to fade. Weeks have passed and he now has a scar on his leg and his wrist that will be with him the rest of his life. He also still has twinges of pain and is still in a wrist guard for a few more weeks. He will have physical therapy and may have times where he feels pain or pops in his arm/wrist for the rest of his life.

So why do I share this? Well because I am broken. I have fallen hard, and was embarrassed to even say anything. I didn't reach out, I didn't tell my  husband or my bishop I just tried to nurse it back myself. Well after a few days of that I knew this was not a sprain, not a twist a real break. I have to have healing, I need a doctor. So now I am reaching out I am posting because others who go through this need to know it happens. Sometimes it is because we are not careful, sometimes that slippery ice (Satan) is just below our feet. I have had my hardest fall since starting recovery. I am not proud of it, I know what I did was wrong and the people I hurt but I also know this: I have the master surgeon. Satan tried to tell me that it can heal on it's own that I didn't need the help, the pain would go away if I kept lying, just quit but kept it to myself etc. I know now that it won't. I must endure the pain of the healing. I know that it will not just heal on it's own. I may need to go in for extensive surgery (seeing my bishop, holding to my husband). They may need to remove part of a less important bone to help heal the more useful one. I may endure pain and I may still have to be in a wrist guard for weeks to come but it will heal, with time, with the right methods and by following my master surgeon the Savior this break will heal. He promises us that. Just like my brother-in-law had to go to a doctor to receive healing, no doctor suddenly called him up and said Hey I felt you broke your arm, no he had to go in, he had to say I'm hurting, I'm broken and then they fixed him. So it is with our Savior he is there, waiting, with his proper medications, surgery and healing we just have to go to him and say I am broken, I am hurting. He will then take us in his arms and let the healing, even if it's slow, begin. We may even have some residual pain or scarring for the rest of our lives but we will be healed and we will have full use of our spirits again.

This is also on my  music page but thought I'd post this song here. It has inspired me a lot lately. Broken by Kenneth Cope
 


Bryan
03/19/2013 8:11am

I'm not sure I can say it enough - You are amazing Jana! I'm proud of you. I will be holding your hand through this whole "surgery", ready to be your crutch when you need it. I love you!

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03/19/2013 10:27am

Hey, Jana! Let the healing begin! Way to go! Don't be chicken, it feels great to get moving in the right direction. Lots of love and prayers.

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Iheartseattle
03/19/2013 2:10pm

Love that song! And it is so perfect for you eight now. I'm glad to see/read that you finally went to see your "doctor", I'll bet that was so hard. You're an inspiration to me--I hope you believe me when I say that.

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03/19/2013 6:00pm

This was beautiful. Save this post. Put it on a list somewhere because this very post will help the future you when you feel low again This was honest and humble and I am so very proud of you.:-)

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sabrina
04/16/2013 6:03am

HELLO to my friends out there i am testifying about the good work of a man who help me it has been hell from the day my husband left me i am a woman with two kids my problem stated when the father of my kids travel i never help he was living but as at two weeks i did not set my eye on my husband i try calling but he was not taken my call some week he call me telling me that he has found love some where easy at first i never take to be serous but day after he came to the house to pick his things that was the time i notice that things is going bad i help he will come back but things was going bad day by day i needed to talk to someone about it so i went to his friend but there was no help so i give it up on him month later i met on the the internet a spell caster i never believe on this but i needed my men back so i gave the spell caster my problem at first i never trusted him so i was just doing it for doing sake but after three day my husband called me telling me that he his coming home i still do not believe but as at the six day the father to my kids came to the house asking me to for give him the spell work to said to my self from that day i was happy with my family thanks to the esango priest of (abamieghe)esango priest he his a great man you need to try him you can as well to tell him your problem so that he can be of help to you his content email is this esangopriest@hotmail.com indeed you are a priest thank you for making my home a happy home again. remember his email is esangopriest@hotmail.com

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Andrew Lotts
07/26/2013 6:11am


I was desperate on trying to turn my life around. I talked to ogbefispell@gmail.com about which spell would be the best for me help me get the house we wanted. The results have been great and we hope to close escrow next week. I know this would have not been possible with out your help as the property had gone off the market and after your spell it suddenly was back on the market a week later. Just amazing, Thank you so much ogbefispell@gmail.com........
Andrew Lotts Springs

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Carlos
05/21/2014 9:42am

Thank you indianspell@hotmail.com for getting my ex girlfriend back ! she is the woman of my dreams. I met her at the Carnival and everything is great. you are a man of your words indianspell@hotmail.com

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05/21/2014 9:46am

This was even faster than I could dream of. Thank you for taking time to listen to me and answering all my emails. I feel emotional strong again. My confidence is back and I see my future clearly. I am forever grateful indianspell@hotmail.com for your help in re-uniting me with my old lover.

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flora james
11/18/2014 11:36am

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    A humble daughter of God seeking recovery through the atonement and 12 step addiction recovery program.

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